Dream chasing feels heavy sometimes with the amount of decisions we have to make. I feel like Mel Gibson at the end of Braveheart, my favorite movie. He is being tortured by having his arms and legs stretched in different directions. The strain on his joints as horses pull causes him to experience tremendous agony. Freedom! He ends up yelling before he loses his life. That about sums up my brain at times. I think, I’m going to go this way, then someone mentions a new piece of information and then I zig-zag. Never mind, I will head this way. You and I will never reach our fullest potential acting in this manner. Momentum happens over time so we need to learn how to stop over analyzing. These 5 steps help me to forge ahead in a direction.

choosing a direction

1. Perfection is a myth. This is the root of all the over analyzing. The myth that decisions are perfect; that if you just make the right choice it will all be wonderful. The clouds will part, light will shine down on you and the angles will sing. Look at this man; he chose wisely.  Make the wrong choice and you will be miserable and everyone will point and laugh. This is not reality. We make the best choice with the information that we have.

2. Life of learning. This is the mindset we should have. No matter if we choose the best choice or the worst we will learn. We will be perfecting our choices. That should be our measuring stick. Perfecting, not perfection. Focus on health and you will grow in your decision-making. This will take a lot of the fear out of acting on a decision.

3. Set a deadline. Set a deadline of when you will stop thinking and choose how long you will travel in that direction. When I started writing I didn’t know if I would enjoy it. I knew I wanted to help people and I knew I liked restoring. That was all the information I had so I dedicated to write for a year no matter what. That will end in five weeks and then a new decision will be made.

4. Narrow or broaden your view. If you are a big picture person come down to earth for a minute. If you are a narrow vision person expand your horizon. We all tend to look at life one way. I look at the big picture too much. I need to come back down to earth and look at life in a different way. Which way do you naturally look at things? Change it up and it can help you make decisions.

5. Stop asking others. I am way too guilty of this. Are you? I ask so many people and surprise they all have different counsel. There comes a point when you have to shut up and stop asking other people what you should do. Make decisions that you don’t need a co-signer for. You don’t need approval except for your spouse. People will not like your decisions and that is okay. Stop asking!

These 5 things should help you make a decision, but ultimately the battle is between your ears. Your decision is not life or death. If you don’t like the decision, just make a new one. Be blessed on your journey.

What helps you make decisions?

Several years ago I was so out of shape that I could not run a half mile without stopping and this was after being an athlete in high school. My cholesterol was high and my doctor told me I needed to start making changes. “I had to reduce my stress”, he said. How could this be? I was only in my late 20’s! I was seeing success in a lot of areas of life, but like a lot of hard drivers I was ignoring my health and body. The effects on me physically were nothing compared to my mental health. Unfortunately, when life gets busy I think that exercise is the first thing we drop.


Fortunately, I slowly but surely have gotten my health back and now run marathons. I have a stretch goal to run one in every state. You don’t need to run marathons, however, you do need to make physical exercise a part of your everyday life. I have no doubt that running has changed my life and no doubt it will change your life too!

Maybe you just need some motivation to start or a reason to keep going. When chasing your dream, exercising is a must. I believe it is a key ingredient of any serious dream chasers journey. Running will help you to chase your dream by doing these 4 things to your mind!

1. Solitude. If you have a family like I do, there are times where you just want to be alone. Running has provided that for me. It allows me time that I can hear from God. To process my life and to come up with ideas. All of this happens because of the solitude that running provides. Run to get alone time.

2. Confidence. As my runs have gotten longer and faster, my overall confidence has improved. If you start running, you will see a difference in your overall confidence. There is freedom in knowing that pain is temporary and it is a choice to stop. My confidence in knowing that I can push through discomfort has changed my life. I have a level of endurance in my brain that was not there before. Run to push through to new levels in your life. Run to raise your confidence.

3. Energy. Since beginning running, my endurance both physically and mentally has shot up dramatically. Starting things in my life is not hard for me, however, the tenacity to keep going is a weakness. Running has helped my mental energy to increase. Just like a muscle pushing through mental barriers, it will grow your mental energy and stamina.  Run to increase your energy.

4. Relieve stress. We all fight stress in different ways. Some combat it with substances like alcohol. Some people tune life out by watching television. When I was out of shape and miserable, I would sit at home and watch hours of television or play video games because I could tune out my problem. Now when I have high stress I run. Running will help you reduce and even remove some stress the healthy way. Run to reduce your stress.

If you don’t run and are physically able, I encourage you to. Start slow and increase mileage slowly as well. Try running for a month and if you don’t like it you could always find another avenue of physical exercise. Running will change your life if you give it a chance. It won’t be easy, but if you stick with it, it will be worth it. Be blessed on your journey.

What benefits do you get from running?

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I Feel Like A Fake!

Zechariah Newman —  August 17, 2014 — 26 Comments

I feel like a fake. All of this talk of chasing your dream, pressing into God, and putting your family first and I struggle. I struggle with having patience and keeping my family in the proper order. I struggle with trusting God with His timing and His plan for my life. I struggle sometimes with anger toward God. I struggle with resentment toward my wonderful children.



Photo by: KCNewman photography

I never once want you to think that I am the man with the answers. I have few and most of the time I wonder who am I to write advice to others? I often believe my dream will never happen and wonder what is wrong with me.

I struggle with self-hatred and feelings of being unworthy of the call that I feel tugging at my heart. If you struggle with this you are not alone. As a Christian, sometimes we feel we have to have answers. This is so foolish; only God has the answers and only God can bring my dream into fruition. Yet, I struggle thinking I must have a magic bullet and I have to write the words to inspire someone into action.

If I just work hard enough or get the right person to tweet my work, it will fall in line. That somehow my work will magically matter to millions. That with the right uppercut, I will have a knock out and see that ray of sunshine. That God will say, “Well done good and faithful son whom I am well pleased.”

I struggle with trying to please God instead of trusting in His beauty. Instead of basking in His presence, in this moment, I wonder what is wrong with me. Why can’t I get it right?

It is not as hard as you and I make it. It is simple and it is easy if we let Him. If we allow God to take the yoke, it is easy. What if being His son or daughter really was enough? What if trusting God is all we need? What if…

Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

I believe this is the Truth. God loves you and I the way we are today. He wants you to mature, but will never love you more than He does today. I believe that God already says well done! I struggle, however, I believe! Lord raise our eyes to ONLY You! Not some fake, pretend relationship, rather an authentic and real one. One that can admit that I don’t always trust You and that I can cry out in anger and pain. A relationship that’s bigger than playing church, rooted and transformed by surrendering to the cross. Overwhelm us this week with Your presence. Be blessed on your journey.

Do you believe?

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When you are first chasing your dream nothing is more frustrating than having something to say and feeling like no one is listening. I remember writing for six months, twice a week and seeing no results. I had seven email followers after that time. Five were family members and one worked for me. I had one person that didn’t know me after writing 24,000 words.


Photo by: KCNewman Photography

I felt wonderful! Okay, maybe not. I felt like a failure. I felt as if I sucked and I should give up. People talked about converting traffic and I just wanted traffic. Just read my article, I kept thinking. How hard is it to press the blue thumb up on Facebook? I was losing the battlefield of the mind.

I just kept posting on my site thinking that I would get organic traffic if I kept writing posts. This never really happened. If you are waiting for people to find your thing, it won’t happen either. These 4 things will help you to go out and get traffic.

1. Radioguestlist.com. This site is pretty cool. It is a list of some podcasts that are looking for people to be on their shows. You just search for podcasts that are looking for someone like you. If you have a book, it makes it easier to get on a lot of them. These are smaller or new podcasts, but you get backlinks, practice and exposure.

2. Guest posts.  If you don’t have people reading your material, go to where they are. This is not a magic bullet. The more accurate you are with your niche, the more traffic you will generate. I have gotten many of my email followers from doing guest posts.

3. Social media. This is not a plug to share this. The more you are generous with others’ work and sharing what is important to them, the more they will likely share yours. Don’t be so self-focused that you can’t help others with their causes. This should not be favors, rather read and share who you like. Reach out and help someone.

4. The platform builder. This isn’t really on growing your platform, but in remembering the purpose. If God is part of your life, it is Him who we should chase. My walk with God is more important than people listening or not. I trust if I try with all my might and if He wants me to have a platform that is as big as I envision, it will happen. The same is true for your business. Trust God to make your dream known and have patience.

I hope these four things help you build your platform. Remember, dreams that matter take longer than we want and are harder than we want. Stick to it and keep your priorities inline. Be blessed on your journey.

What message are you trying to spread?

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I am ashamed that in the early parts of my journey and still on certain days, I have viewed my family as a hindrance to my dream. If I only had more time. I can’t pursue my dreams because I don’t have time due to the demands of being a dad. These thoughts and excuses were part of my regular life. Blaming them instead of taking full responsibility for my inaction. I talked about this in length in my book, Dreams That Last. The bottom line is this; if you have a family you can either include your family or exclude them.

Including your family in the dream chasing journey will not come easy. It takes commitment and creativity to chase a dream with your family. These 4 things will help you to create a family dream.


1. Margin. This will sound the opposite of chasing your dream with your family, but it’s not. You don’t want your spouse or kids to hate your dream, so as much as possible work on your dream in the margins of your life. I write in the morning before my wife and kids wake up. This helps them to still love my dream because it doesn’t take away from time with them.

2. Have them help. As much as possible ask them to help you. I asked my daughter today how I could be a better dad. My wife, a new blogger, (aimed at you busy moms) corrects my blogs. In our restaurants, our kids have helped roll dough for a few minutes and they have even been tipped by customers. Make it a family affair as much as possible. Your family will be eager to help if you frame it right.

3. Ask and Listen. We need to ask and listen to our families about when to slow down and when it is okay to push. I struggle here as I am a little bit of a stubborn headed mule. I am working on this and you need to work on this too. Listen to your loved ones and if they tell you they feel second, ask them how you can change it. No defense; just listen and come up with an agreed upon plan.

4. Boundaries. Have clear boundaries of work time and family time. I love to write so much this is hard for me. I have stopped writing in the evening to be present as a husband and a dad. What time are you off and keeping sacred for your family? If you love your dream this may be hard, however, it is essential.

Let’s make it a priority to keep family first. Include your family whenever possible. This journey is too long and hard on your own. One day at a time, one action at a time. Encourage your family to speak up. Listen to each person and incorporate your dream into your family. If you do this your family will have a big dream and not just a dream so small for just one. Be blessed on your journey.

How do you include your family in your dream?

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I have been making a lot of traction lately. I have a guest post going live on Faith Driven Business today, six podcast interviews in the next two weeks and all while hitting my writing goal of 500 words a day with my book. I am kind of shocked at my small change and the amazing traction. I am thankful that God opened my eyes through my family and friends. Too often we are close to being on the money, but just a little off.


Photo by: KcNewman Photography

About a month ago I would have told you that I don’t have time for anymore. It is Time Management 101, however, I think overtime we forget. Before I continue remember that time first and foremost must be consecrated to God The only thing I have changed is this. The night before I figure out what I am needing to accomplish and do it the next morning first thing. Figure out the result you need to accomplish and execute it. Then again and again. Small changes over a period of time get massive results.

What I was doing:

I was reading cool blogs and setting Hootsuite for my tweets for the day. What I wasn’t calculating was that I was using the best time in the day for me to write. I was replacing this with promoting and reading other people’s work. Underneath it all I think I was doing what made me feel important instead of what was most important. I have just hit the beginning of reexamining my schedule and I am sure there is much more space. For more on time management here is a good read by my friend, Matt Mcwilliams.

What I am doing now: 

The single thing I am doing is figuring out not what to do, but what I want to accomplish. Then and only then do I plan the activities.

Whether I am excited or not, I am doing what is going to advance my vision first. Right now for me that is two things; reach more people and finish my next book. Each morning I write my 500 words and then either reach out to a few podcasts or write a guest post. That’s nothing thrilling, but it works. What is so strange is I read the same amount of posts and share and comment as well, however, it’s on my time after I have gotten my list done. Figure out what your dream needs most and do it first thing. Try this for a week and let me know what happens.

Whether this is a new concept or you have gotten away from this, I encourage you to begin again. Keep slaying the dragon first thing. Often what we do with twenty percent of our time yields eighty percent of the results. Focus on that twenty percent and do more of it. That will get your dream to another level. Sometimes it’s uncomfortable. It is effective though. Be blessed on your journey.

What small change has given you big results?

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I want a bigger house! I want a nicer car! I want to travel the world! I also want to do all of this now with little effort. Is that too much to ask? The truth is, I struggle with lust. These wants are not bad, but they can become horrible in a hurry.


Photo by: KCNewman Photography

It is simple for me to talk about cultural problems, which is what I was tempted to do, but the problem lies within my heart. Our current culture didn’t create this desire for gain with no sacrifice; we were born with it. It is too easy to take the elevator instead of the stairs. We know the stairs are better for us, but an elevator gets us there with no effort. My friend, Rory Vaden has a great blog on self-discipline. Current inventions like debt have made it simple to indulge my lust to take what feels easy. To put the cart before the horse and just finance it.

When we live an undisciplined life that spins out of control, we make financial choices that don’t match what we really want. That is where I found myself six years ago. Dejected and frustrated I sat in the driveway sitting there with the car running wondering how I got to this point. I had gotten off of work, but couldn’t go inside. For me when I stop, all of the bad decisions and failures I have made come rushing into the front of my mind. Maybe if I sit here it will all go away like waking from a bad dream, I thought. My wife and I had overpaid on a house, put zero down and accumulated consumer debt. When we had begun our lives together we had said that we would just live on my income while she worked. If you are like me sometimes what we say and what we do is completely different. Slowly one bad decision after another had gotten me to this place of sitting in the car.

We were expecting our first child and I was sitting there wondering how we were going to make it month to month on just my income. Our plan was for her to stay at home when we had kids, however, it was more of a wish than a plan. Have you been there? Wondering how you made financial decisions opposite to what you truly wanted?

We don’t wake up one day in a disaster, though it feels that way. We don’t wander into a mess and we certainly won’t magically pop out on the other side. It is a result of a mindset and behaviors that overtime causes us to prosper or sit in a car feeling like an idiot. Often things happen so gradually we don’t even realize what is going on.

We are like a frog. If you boil water and try to put a frog in, it will jump out. When it feels the steam and heat it resists going into the pot. It is fully aware of the danger. We are the same way when there is a huge danger we know to avoid it, well most of the time. Sometimes we are not as smart as a frog. However, if you put a frog into cold water and turn the heat on high and warm the water slowly, the frog will not jump. He will sit there while being boiled. Gradual temperature change is not even noticed by the frog. This is true for most of us as well the deaths of a thousand cuts are not even noticed. I have been this frog more times than I can count.

Are you tired of being a frog? Ready to change your life and live with more than enough instead of barely getting by? Great! That is a good place to start. To get to a point of being tired of your current situation is the first step to change. Change will not come easy, but there can be enjoyment and fulfillment today. Not when you are done changing your finances, rather the here and now.

I looked at financial discipline all wrong in the beginning, therefore I didn’t stick to any budget or other financial management. Here it is simply. A budget when given thought and time instructs your money to go towards your true wants and desires, not your frivolous wants in the moment.

Sticking to a budget and investing money overtime will get you and I the wants financially that we truly desire. That is why disciplining ourselves with a budget is so important instead of pitifully sitting in a car. My wife is able to stay home with our children. We have everything we need and a sense of peace about the direction we are going.

Say no to lust and yes to what matters. Create a budget monthly with your spouse. Learn from me and live a life of purpose financially before you wake up down a road you weren’t intending to head down. In most cases the stairs are actually easier than the elevator. Be blessed on your journey.

This is part of the new book I am working on called, “A Life That Prospers.” What money questions, problems, or solutions do you have?

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I have been slowing down more, but I have a long way to go. If you haven’t checked out Jeff Goins Slow Down Challenge you should. It is crucial that you chase your dream the right way. I am becoming more effective and getting much better results out of my activity the more I slow down. Now slowing down to watch more T.V. is not the goal. To slow down and admire life while living in the moment is our aim. This beauty of slowing down will propel your dream if you marry the two ideas.

An abundent harvest

photo by: KC Newman Photography

I pray that after last week’s post you have written out your vision so that you don’t waste your opportunities.

Too often we scurry around for what? We know we have to say no to the good things to say yes to the great, however, we still say yes to everything! Get off the hamster wheel!

After praying and seeking God and writing down what He has put in your heart, it is time to breathe life into it. We do this through partnering with God and planting seeds. Slow down and examine your activity. What seeds are you planting? What harvest will you reap?

Be specific when sowing seed. Could you imagine a farmer grabbing random seeds and tossing them out all over the ground? He would reap a harvest, but it would be weeds, flowers and a crop. However, if instead he maps out his property deciding what to plant and where to plant it, he will receive a harvest that can support his family. The farmer is just as active in both scenarios, but with drastic differences. Make sure that your activity is aimed at your vision.

Focus on the planting. When a farmer is planting his field he sows many seeds. Your dream will be the same way. You will sow many seeds to turn it into reality. The temptation is to plant a seed and see if anything happens. It is a big temptation for me to post a blog and then stare at the analytics for a few days. My activity and planning slow way down to watch to see if a seed sprouts. Rather, I should post the blog and move onto something new right away. Planting with a purpose, then another and another. Focus on focused activity.

The only way to change your life or to have new breakthrough is to do things differently than you have done them. Slow down, take your vision and create action steps to turn it into reality. Remove the bad or good seeds and plant many great seeds with purpose and vision. Be blessed on your journey.

 What are you sowing this week?

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A close friend of mine that runs a highly successful tech company asked me a few weeks ago, “What are your plans for the future?” I heard myself say, “I don’t know?” Like a slow motion fail. To me this interaction showed a deeper problem. Interactions just like that surrender opportunities to advance and spread our vision. One small question that could be an open door surrendered. You and I never know who people know and what they need. In these moments, the dream inside of me and the dream inside of you almost shrinks back.


photo by: KCNewman photography

Why do we get so confused?

Doubt and fear pull us down. Good opportunities push us away from the dreams we feel God speaking into us. This is why I stopped and had no answer. Has this happened to you? Bold in a direction one day and then a few days later bold in a different direction. Yeah me neither. I was asking for a friend. In all actuality this happens to us all, yet we feel fear telling us not to talk about it. Our minds change on their own. What we think matters. Someone we trust says, “It doesn’t matter.” These things will push and pull us causing us to stand still. Stop the confusion!

Don’t waste another opportunity!

I don’t want you or I to waste another opportunity. Proverbs 29:18 says, “Where there is no vision the people perish.” So, with vision the people shall flourish. What is your vision? Could you explain it to me? What problem are you solving and for who are you solving it? You need to write it down. You need to know what you are aiming at. This is the only way to overcome the push and pull that will happen in your life.

Write down what you feel God calling you to in 3 to 5 years. In other words, where are you headed? Don’t think about the obstacles for a second. We live so small. We overestimate what we can do in a day and underestimate what we can do in a few years.

Stay focused!
The power of being focused for a period of time cannot be overstated. Writing and sticking to what you wrote will save you time and energy. Your written vision will help you in what to say “no” to and what to say “yes” to. It will stop you and I from getting so distracted with all the shiny things out there. Make it a priority to pray, seek God, and write down what He is saying.

Expand your horizons. Allow yourself to have the expectant hope of a child again. Write it down and start walking in that direction. Be prepared to share, learn from me and capitalize on opportunities to share your dream. Be blessed on your journey.

What do you feel God calling you to in the next three years?

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God has given me almost all of the dreams of my heart. Yet it seems like some of the dreams may never happen. It reminds me that I am no different than one of my favorite dream chasers from the Bible, Abraham. The great faith that this man had amazes me. He was not perfect, yet he showed time and time again that he would trust God. Unfortunately, I think he is most remembered for one of his mistakes; a time in his life when he and his wife lacked faith to see the full promise of God.

God had promised Abraham that he would be the start of a great nation. That his descendants would be as numerous as the stars. I can only imagine his excitement because Abraham and Sarah had no children. This is something that they both longed for.


photo by: KCNewman Photography

Years went by and God had given them land and great wealth but no children. That is when the major doubt started to come in. So much that Sarah decided it was a good idea to have her children come through her maidservant, Hagar. She presented the idea to Abraham and he agreed. He took Hagar to be his other wife.

Hagar went on to give birth to Ishmael. God’s promise to make Abraham a great nation was still there. He was to make Abraham and Sarah the start. She would have a son named, Isaac. Honestly, all they did by taking the dream of having numerous descendants into their own hands complicated their relationship and their lives.

It is amazing to me what we are all capable of when we want something so bad. When we elevate our dream to an improper height, it can easily distort and change to find a way that seems logical at the time but has major consequences.

On the path to your dream you will face the Ishmael test. It looks different for all of us, however, there will be a point in time that you will be tempted to settle and plan for what you know is second best. For what you are fully aware is not what God intends. You will have a point where your hope is weak. This is when great faith will be required of you.

When Abraham and Sarah had the Hagar idea Abraham was eighty-six. He had lived in the land God promised him for over ten years. This is the time where you will be tempted to settle. When the window of time appears to be closing. When the journey has been long. Don’t stop. Just keep walking out the path that God has laid before you.

What God promises he will fulfill in His timing and in His way. Do not rationalize and justify, but do your part. Keep taking focused steps and trusting God with the rest. Be blessed on your journey.

Have you been tempted to settle for less than God’s best?

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