I Failed! Now What?

Zechariah Newman —  November 3, 2014 — 11 Comments

I have had a day of wrestling with God. I wrote a few articles for big sites and I didn’t even hear back. It feels like a punch in the gut. A big NO coming in the form of silence. It feels like asking to sit at the “cool” table and everyone ignores you; just this air of silence and dejection. I can get into a mode where I feel like if I switch a behavior or have enough faith, then He will allow my want to come through. If I change, then I can sit at the table and will be accepted.

It's possible

photo by: KCNewman Photography

This dream chasing is not easy. Your path will be littered like mine with rejection and failure. Winston Churchill said, “Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.” How true this is. Our dreams are going to require us to dust ourselves off and get back up. To rise again after failure is one of the most important habits to get into. To learn to not quit, separates history makers from the forgotten.  These 5 principles will bring you back from rejection and failure.

1. Speak Life. In Proverbs 18:21 it says that, “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” Talk about conviction. When I have a problem I talk about it and think about it until no one will listen and then I will start calling people to talk about it some more. This is not what God tells us to do. We need to speak life into our situation. Speaking the promises of God gets our minds off of our own inadequacies and on the One that changes us! Talk about how big your God is and not how big your problem is. It is okay to wrestle and cry out to God, but in the end we need to bring it back to His promises.

2. Take Ownership. We must take ownership for our actions and inactions. It is easier to blame others, however, the truth is the responsibility is ours. Shirking responsibility gives power to others and is the beginning of justification for our actions. Take ownership of what you can control and give the rest to God. I will write new pieces for some of those sites trying to improve my writing. Trying a new angle and a fresh look to see if that’s what they are looking for. How can you take more responsibility?

3. Get Counsel. Proverbs 15:22 states, “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.” I will get counsel from my coach as well as other people I trust. We have blind spots as people and that is one of the reasons why we need each other. Get counsel before you shoot again. Your dream is your baby and frankly no matter how impartial you think you are, you aren’t. A group of people can help you look at it more honestly and lead you in a proper direction. Get counsel from wise people.

4. Reconnect With Why. Your why is your anchor, not your what. Stop getting hung up on how and what. We always like to go there. Rekindle your passion for the dream by cementing with your why. If you are married talk with your spouse. My wife remembers things that I forget that help me when I am feeling low. Times that God came through and things that I have said. Write down why and say it out loud.

5. God’s Plan. The reality is when we are living in God’s will, we need to lay down our timing. Sometimes, like the Israelites, we think we are ready to fight and we are not. Sometimes we need to walk around in the desert to prepare instead of going the quick route. God loves you and I believe He wants the best for your life even if it’s not what you want. Continue to push forward, but remember God is the dream giver. You are the one partnering with Him to do His plan. Trust God. He is faithful and just.

Remember your feelings in failure are just that; feelings. The fact is God loves you and has your back. Get back up and fight. Fight for things worth fighting for. Every person that has accomplished anything has had obstacles to overcome. The bigger the obstacle, the sweeter the victory. God will be faithful my friend. It is not easy, however, it is worth it. Be blessed on your journey.

 What makes you get back up?

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  • Great article my brother! I have found that we are called to be unique. So with that said sir, you are not going to fit every where BUT those places that you do fit you are going to shine brighter than you could ever imagine!

  • Silence and rejection can be hard. I faced it when I was trying to get a book traditionally published. But God helped me through my questions.
    You have great tips.
    For me, I just stayed connected to God and realized that HIS plan was different than mine. After that I gave over my writing to Him. I had thought I’d already done that, but through those rejections I realized that I was still trying to control and navigate it with Christ as my co-pilot.

    It was a humbling and yet liberating time. I’m very thankful things didn’t go the way I’d planned.

    • Totally relate TC. It is easy to forget it is Christ and Christ alone. Thanks TC

  • Those are great attitudes to have when it comes to failing or making a mistake. Each time I get knocked down or want to quit, I remind myself of my why and passions, doing so allows me to get back up and keep moving forward.

  • Man, sorry to hear that you’re going through such a frustrating time. I know in the past I’ve struggled with discouragement. I would just pray for some encouragement from God, and he would always deliver in some form or another. Also, this quote has been helpful: “Never doubt in the dark what God told you in the light.” In other words, when it gets tough, remember your calling.

    • Thanks Loren. Great advice. I have already sent more…just a minor set back. Blessings buddy.

  • These are great points. I can definitely relate to this sort of feeling. What often makes these kinds of experiences doubly challenging is that pursuing an inward dream is something that makes you automatically exposed and vulnerable. Which is why rejection can sting that much more. Have always loved this line from WB Yeats’ poem The Cloths of Heaven.

    ‘But I, being poor, have only my dreams; I have spread my dreams under your feet; Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.’

    I guess, in the end, it only strengthens the courage needed to ultimately take hold of the goal.